Tomorrow is the Day

Hi All,
Baron is soooo excited about his birthday tomorrow. For those who have not yet purchased a gift, Baron has refined his wish list.
1) Elevator - Baron thought an elevator would be an improvement over a ladder or acorn costume. This way he can easily reach the treetops without exertion.
2) Forget all of the above and just give him his very own squirrel. Hint: the squirrel must be alive and caged. He does not want a free range squirrel actually on the range. I tried giving him a stuffed squirrel, but after 10 minutes of shaking the poor toy, he gave me a very disappointed look and pointed to the trees. I guess part of the fun is in the hunt - he just doesn't want it to be too difficult.
3) A duck. In this case Baron (and his devoted family) prefers one already cooked, in cherry sauce (due to his allergies, the sauce should not contain grain or flour). Please include instructions for reheating if it is not warm when delivered.
4)Birthday cake. We all know that chocolate is poisonous to dogs, so Baron would like a cake made of duck liver; his name should be written with potatoes.
5) A bed. He would prefer a masculine 4 poster bed with down blankets for the cold winter. Baron is used to goose down (related to ducks) as he already sleeps on several pillow goose down pillows. He wants nothing less for his own bedding.*
5) Jacket. Baron is humiliated by the warm jacket I insist he wear on frigid days. He would like a camouflage jacket with matching hat and boots (yes, dogs do wear boots or a reasonable facsimile - their paws are sensitive to snow and ice).
5)New bones. His favorite are deer antlers, preferabbly still attached to the deer.

Ok, I know you are all wondering what I am getting Baron. He requested a 2 month hiatus from visiting the beauty parlor, but that's not going to happen. I am taking him on several long walks and continuing to provide: duck and potato dog food (not inexpensive), treats as appropriate (also duck and potato), visits to his vet as necessary, dog tags, name tag, grooming, a warm bed to sleep on unless we are lucky and someone gives him a new one that he will actually use, great companionship (that would be from me personally, of course), visits to the barn to see his equine friends (from a distance), visits to the allergist if necessary (hopefully not) and any other incidentals including a full-time nanny.
I had better get busy planning the party.
Love to all,
Botswain
*Ok Ok, I added the bed and bedding - anything to give him his own space at night, which, hopefully won't overlap with mine. Next I might build a soundproof room - Baron snores. He also farts, but we won't go there.