Hi All,
One reader recently commented on how well trained Baron must be, because she had not received a Poodle Place e-mail in quite a while. The answer is very simple - I am too tired to write! Of course Vance wishes I was also too tired to talk.
Unfortunately for our heroine (that would be me, in case you forgot), Baron's training is going so well that his personal trainer is guaranteed a lifetime annuity. We are even augmenting his training with agility work, in an effort to redirect his boundless energy. It is not effective.
Here is the update: along with dog training, Baron is continuing with his interest in cooking. Most recently, while I was out, Vance left Baron alone in the kitchen with a sealed container of spicy tomato sauce and mussels (in the shells). When our heroine entered the kitchen, she found an ecstatic puppy (that would be Baron) with tomato sauce on his head, on the counter, floor etc. etc. In addition, there were also remnants of mussel shells scattered about. I was able to remove the sauce from his head, but I am not too fond of the lingering scent. Upon hearing this sad tail, one friend commented that I am lucky he didn't decide to heat up the tomato sauce!
So, dear readers, you get to decide who Baron emulates - Betty Crocker or Davy Crockett?
There is more exciting news from Poodle Place (depending on your definition of excitement), but I have to run. Baron has an appointment with the doggie dermatologist (aka allergist)and we have to get dressed. Baron has already proven that he is fond of the color red, but we will forego the tomato sauce hat.
Botswain
PS
If anyone has recipes to share with the pungent poodle, please send them to me first so that I can scan the ingredients for allergens.
April 28, 2009
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Home on the Range at Poodle Place
Hi All,
I am now home after a relaxing vacation in San Diego. It is but a distant memory. The big news is that while I was away eating at lovely restaurants (the definition of "lovely" is anything not cooked by me), Baron was busy at home - in the kitchen!
Earlier it was suggested to me since I spent so much time in the kitchen tending to a very sick dog that perhaps I should try cooking. The good news is I don't have to do so, because Baron has taken an interest in cooking (not to mention eating).
Yes, fellow poodle lovers, it is true - Baron is learning to cook!!! At first I thought he meant it as a surprise for me upon my return home - perhaps to thank me for all I went through when he was so ill; now I think he had a more devious motive.
Here is the scoop: Stephanie (beloved dog sitter) briefly left the kitchen and returned to find that Baron had managed to turn on the gas range. This really upsets me, not due to the obvious danger, but because I think he might be trying to duplicate my famous recipe for "Special Mommy Eggs"! For those who are unfamiliar with this, my kids thought "Special Mommy Eggs" were a delicacy until they reached the age of 18 and went off to college. Fortunately, the recipe can be adapted to "Special Wifey Eggs". Vance really enjoys them - he is just happy to receive a "home cooked" meal. I am sure Baron was trying to steal my recipe because when Stephanie returned to the kitchen, her reading glasses were broken. Baron may be smart, but he is not smart enough to know that "Special Mommy Eggs" doesn't require a recipe. It is a very creative dish, which is different each time I make it (thankfully, not often).
I know, you are probably thinking of the mess Baron made. You have nothing to worry about, because unlike most men, Baron tried to clean up after himself. He actually managed to turn on the garbage disposal. While he had very good intentions, the motor burned out, hence the disposal had to be replaced.
Well, that is the latest. So nice to be back home on the range! I know Baron joins me in wishing everyone a healthy, happy new year, filled with fun and laughter. I have to run now, as Baron's trainer will arrive soon. Actually, I am thinking of eliminating the trainer and giving him cooking lessons instead!
Love,
Botswain
January 9, 2009
I am now home after a relaxing vacation in San Diego. It is but a distant memory. The big news is that while I was away eating at lovely restaurants (the definition of "lovely" is anything not cooked by me), Baron was busy at home - in the kitchen!
Earlier it was suggested to me since I spent so much time in the kitchen tending to a very sick dog that perhaps I should try cooking. The good news is I don't have to do so, because Baron has taken an interest in cooking (not to mention eating).
Yes, fellow poodle lovers, it is true - Baron is learning to cook!!! At first I thought he meant it as a surprise for me upon my return home - perhaps to thank me for all I went through when he was so ill; now I think he had a more devious motive.
Here is the scoop: Stephanie (beloved dog sitter) briefly left the kitchen and returned to find that Baron had managed to turn on the gas range. This really upsets me, not due to the obvious danger, but because I think he might be trying to duplicate my famous recipe for "Special Mommy Eggs"! For those who are unfamiliar with this, my kids thought "Special Mommy Eggs" were a delicacy until they reached the age of 18 and went off to college. Fortunately, the recipe can be adapted to "Special Wifey Eggs". Vance really enjoys them - he is just happy to receive a "home cooked" meal. I am sure Baron was trying to steal my recipe because when Stephanie returned to the kitchen, her reading glasses were broken. Baron may be smart, but he is not smart enough to know that "Special Mommy Eggs" doesn't require a recipe. It is a very creative dish, which is different each time I make it (thankfully, not often).
I know, you are probably thinking of the mess Baron made. You have nothing to worry about, because unlike most men, Baron tried to clean up after himself. He actually managed to turn on the garbage disposal. While he had very good intentions, the motor burned out, hence the disposal had to be replaced.
Well, that is the latest. So nice to be back home on the range! I know Baron joins me in wishing everyone a healthy, happy new year, filled with fun and laughter. I have to run now, as Baron's trainer will arrive soon. Actually, I am thinking of eliminating the trainer and giving him cooking lessons instead!
Love,
Botswain
January 9, 2009
Post Traumatic Stress Disorder
Hello All,
Thank you all for your best wishes and concern for Baron's health. I am pleased to give you an update:
Baron returned home from the vet yesterday after an expensive week. Prior to being admitted, he attended the day spa at the Animal Hospital, receiving a honey wrap and hydrotherapy. However, after a painful (and this is not funny) weekend, with Baron howling in pain, he had emergency surgery last Monday, and stayed at the Animal Hospital for an entire week, which was not an inexpensive proposition. He returned home yesterday on tranquilizers, to ensure that: 1) he doesn't get too excited 2) he doesn't lick the incision necessitating another week or more at the Animal Spa.
I greeted Baron at the vet's expecting a subdued and tranquilized dog. He was tranquilized, but subdued? I don't think so. He greeted me warmly by jumping enthusiastically (with his 2 medical collars on). I said, "I thought he was tranquilized." The vet tech said, "He's just so happy to see you." He was also equally happy to see my patients, the landscaper, etc.
We were told to continue tranquilizing him until after his check-up on Thursday. While I had been blissfully thinking that a tranquil Baron might be something to consider long term, it's not what I expected. Here is a synopsis of Baron on tranquilizers:
1) Mad dash to the dog run (heaven forbid he should be let loose in the yard and re-injure himself) with a hope of running past the dog run (no way - too $$$$$ already). Pouncing enthusiastically on the snow, and barking while standing on hind legs to illustrate his point - GET ME OUT OF HERE!!!
2) Carefully extricating a squash from the counter and eating half of it. He sent his regards to the chef.
3) Escaping to the living room, his favorite site of mischief - no he couldn't chew on the intricately carved elephant tusk that belonged to my mother-in-law, Betty, he already did that. He did manage to knock over a picture frame and an antique snuff bottle that belonged to Betty (aha - could there be a connection?).
4) He accompanied me to the pet store because I heard about a new "Cone" to keep him from licking his incision. He managed to charge into the store, growl at a man who laughed at him (in his current fashion accessory - a plastic cone), and tried to grab a few treats along the way.
Worst of all, he has Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome! He was so traumatized by his medical situation, that he no longer remembers how to sit, stay, etc. We have had (up until now) 4 dog trainers (but who is counting) and he forgot everything!!! I am afraid to send him to overnight boot camp, because, in his weakened condition, he might become ill, or, even worse, jump on the trainer or a Chihuahua, and incur a law suit in addition to his other expenses.
Well, there you have it. Baron is back home - for better or worse. As for me - I am not, shall we say, as perturbed at his behavior as I usually am.
If anyone has any suggestions re: training of a poodle with Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome, let me know.
Love,
Botswain
December 2, 2009
Thank you all for your best wishes and concern for Baron's health. I am pleased to give you an update:
Baron returned home from the vet yesterday after an expensive week. Prior to being admitted, he attended the day spa at the Animal Hospital, receiving a honey wrap and hydrotherapy. However, after a painful (and this is not funny) weekend, with Baron howling in pain, he had emergency surgery last Monday, and stayed at the Animal Hospital for an entire week, which was not an inexpensive proposition. He returned home yesterday on tranquilizers, to ensure that: 1) he doesn't get too excited 2) he doesn't lick the incision necessitating another week or more at the Animal Spa.
I greeted Baron at the vet's expecting a subdued and tranquilized dog. He was tranquilized, but subdued? I don't think so. He greeted me warmly by jumping enthusiastically (with his 2 medical collars on). I said, "I thought he was tranquilized." The vet tech said, "He's just so happy to see you." He was also equally happy to see my patients, the landscaper, etc.
We were told to continue tranquilizing him until after his check-up on Thursday. While I had been blissfully thinking that a tranquil Baron might be something to consider long term, it's not what I expected. Here is a synopsis of Baron on tranquilizers:
1) Mad dash to the dog run (heaven forbid he should be let loose in the yard and re-injure himself) with a hope of running past the dog run (no way - too $$$$$ already). Pouncing enthusiastically on the snow, and barking while standing on hind legs to illustrate his point - GET ME OUT OF HERE!!!
2) Carefully extricating a squash from the counter and eating half of it. He sent his regards to the chef.
3) Escaping to the living room, his favorite site of mischief - no he couldn't chew on the intricately carved elephant tusk that belonged to my mother-in-law, Betty, he already did that. He did manage to knock over a picture frame and an antique snuff bottle that belonged to Betty (aha - could there be a connection?).
4) He accompanied me to the pet store because I heard about a new "Cone" to keep him from licking his incision. He managed to charge into the store, growl at a man who laughed at him (in his current fashion accessory - a plastic cone), and tried to grab a few treats along the way.
Worst of all, he has Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome! He was so traumatized by his medical situation, that he no longer remembers how to sit, stay, etc. We have had (up until now) 4 dog trainers (but who is counting) and he forgot everything!!! I am afraid to send him to overnight boot camp, because, in his weakened condition, he might become ill, or, even worse, jump on the trainer or a Chihuahua, and incur a law suit in addition to his other expenses.
Well, there you have it. Baron is back home - for better or worse. As for me - I am not, shall we say, as perturbed at his behavior as I usually am.
If anyone has any suggestions re: training of a poodle with Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome, let me know.
Love,
Botswain
December 2, 2009
Some things just aren't funny
Hi All,
This has been quite the week, and it's only Monday. For once, humor eludes me. Can nothing be easy with Baron? I think this dog is on a "self-destruct" mission after his neutering. Baron, despite 6 visits to the vet last week (but who's counting?), was in terrible pain, even with painkillers etc. I brought him to our vet this morning, whose staff thankfully took him in 1/2 hour before their "official" opening time. He cried in pain during the entire drive to the office. Dr. Luke performed surgery this morning to remove the necrotic tissue, and inflammation, but some of the original inflammation remains. Please keep your fingers crossed that this works, as I know it was our best option.
I was up with Baron so many times in the last 2 nights that I forgot he is a poodle and not a child. I am in no rush to have him home, although I really miss him (even the jumping - don't quote me), because I want to make sure he heals. He managed to bypass 2 post-surgical collars and diapers (don't ask) to hurt himself (not intentionally).
Last week I actually slept in the kitchen one night, and it wasn't because I fell asleep cooking. I am seriously considering installing heated floors in the kitchen along with a Murphy bed (OK - a little humor). I'll keep you posted on his recovery, and so far so good. It was pointed out to me that I am now spending so much time in the kitchen, I might as well cook - nah, I don't think so.
Botswain
November 25, 2008
This has been quite the week, and it's only Monday. For once, humor eludes me. Can nothing be easy with Baron? I think this dog is on a "self-destruct" mission after his neutering. Baron, despite 6 visits to the vet last week (but who's counting?), was in terrible pain, even with painkillers etc. I brought him to our vet this morning, whose staff thankfully took him in 1/2 hour before their "official" opening time. He cried in pain during the entire drive to the office. Dr. Luke performed surgery this morning to remove the necrotic tissue, and inflammation, but some of the original inflammation remains. Please keep your fingers crossed that this works, as I know it was our best option.
I was up with Baron so many times in the last 2 nights that I forgot he is a poodle and not a child. I am in no rush to have him home, although I really miss him (even the jumping - don't quote me), because I want to make sure he heals. He managed to bypass 2 post-surgical collars and diapers (don't ask) to hurt himself (not intentionally).
Last week I actually slept in the kitchen one night, and it wasn't because I fell asleep cooking. I am seriously considering installing heated floors in the kitchen along with a Murphy bed (OK - a little humor). I'll keep you posted on his recovery, and so far so good. It was pointed out to me that I am now spending so much time in the kitchen, I might as well cook - nah, I don't think so.
Botswain
November 25, 2008
Poodle Place in Shambles
Hi All,
You haven't heard from me in awhile because I've been overwhelmed. Why am I overwhelmed, you might ask? I'll be happy to tell you.
In the past week, Baron (aka Jaws) has been very busy, and has forgotten that he is not an actual little boy, but a dog, and a rather large dog. Here is what he has accomplished.
1) He knocked over (and broke) the jade sculpture which had been my mother-in-law's. To be fair, I already knocked it over and had just brought it home - repaired. Back to the Jeweled Elephant! Actually, they rather enjoyed the Baron stories I regaled them with when I was having my necklace (also damaged by you know who) repaired along with the sculpture.
2) I know this was an honest mistake which could happen to anyone (or any dog), but Baron mistook the beautifully hand carved ivory elephant tusk, which also belonged to my mother-in-law, for his bone. Fortunately Vance noticed this mistake, and it, too, goes to the Jeweled Elephant for repair. I think I will keep them on a retainer.
3) In his enthusiasm to eat his dog treats he knocked over his ceramic "cookie" jar, breaking it. Fortunately, this was not worth repairing, particularly because he does not deserve any treats. By the way, I was not home when he tried to help himself, and I know "boys will be boys".
4) He knocked over my favorite Noah's Ark cookie jar (human treats) given to me by my parents. Fortunately, this did not break, although I think there may be only one poodle on the arc!
5) I took Baron to the Farmer's Market (an obvious mistake). He does like other dogs, but doesn't realize how big he is and tends to threaten smaller dogs. Today, however, he went up to a Newfoundland. For my non dog friends, a Newfoundland is a very large dog that resembles a brown bear. The owner said he is very friendly. Baron playfully jumped at him and the Newfoundland growled. The owner said she never heard him growl before. I told her to stick around and she'll hear me growl!
5) I began to sound like - yes, my mother - and not in a good way. I recall all of the interrupted telephone conversations we had when Mom had Rocky, her beloved, huge and poorly trained until he was about 5 years old, German Shepherd. Here is how I sounded while on the phone with both my travel agent and the vet:
No, Baron (said sweetly).
BARON, NO!!! (Not said sweetly).
BARON, I'VE HAD IT!!! (Said in an unkind tone of voice).
BARON THAT IS IT!!! (Screamed in a shrill hysterical voice).
The vet had called to check on Baron's health after his recent ear infection etc., and instead heard about my emotional health (not good). He suggested neutering Baron immediately. I asked if he had to do it, or could I do it without using an anesthetic. Baron is 10 months old, and the breeder and another vet at the office both suggested waiting until Baron is 11 or 12 months old. Vance agrees with them - but more about that in another e-mail.
Let's look at the bright side - I should sleep well tonight - if Baron will leave room for me on the bed!
Botswain
September 10, 2008
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
You haven't heard from me in awhile because I've been overwhelmed. Why am I overwhelmed, you might ask? I'll be happy to tell you.
In the past week, Baron (aka Jaws) has been very busy, and has forgotten that he is not an actual little boy, but a dog, and a rather large dog. Here is what he has accomplished.
1) He knocked over (and broke) the jade sculpture which had been my mother-in-law's. To be fair, I already knocked it over and had just brought it home - repaired. Back to the Jeweled Elephant! Actually, they rather enjoyed the Baron stories I regaled them with when I was having my necklace (also damaged by you know who) repaired along with the sculpture.
2) I know this was an honest mistake which could happen to anyone (or any dog), but Baron mistook the beautifully hand carved ivory elephant tusk, which also belonged to my mother-in-law, for his bone. Fortunately Vance noticed this mistake, and it, too, goes to the Jeweled Elephant for repair. I think I will keep them on a retainer.
3) In his enthusiasm to eat his dog treats he knocked over his ceramic "cookie" jar, breaking it. Fortunately, this was not worth repairing, particularly because he does not deserve any treats. By the way, I was not home when he tried to help himself, and I know "boys will be boys".
4) He knocked over my favorite Noah's Ark cookie jar (human treats) given to me by my parents. Fortunately, this did not break, although I think there may be only one poodle on the arc!
5) I took Baron to the Farmer's Market (an obvious mistake). He does like other dogs, but doesn't realize how big he is and tends to threaten smaller dogs. Today, however, he went up to a Newfoundland. For my non dog friends, a Newfoundland is a very large dog that resembles a brown bear. The owner said he is very friendly. Baron playfully jumped at him and the Newfoundland growled. The owner said she never heard him growl before. I told her to stick around and she'll hear me growl!
5) I began to sound like - yes, my mother - and not in a good way. I recall all of the interrupted telephone conversations we had when Mom had Rocky, her beloved, huge and poorly trained until he was about 5 years old, German Shepherd. Here is how I sounded while on the phone with both my travel agent and the vet:
No, Baron (said sweetly).
BARON, NO!!! (Not said sweetly).
BARON, I'VE HAD IT!!! (Said in an unkind tone of voice).
BARON THAT IS IT!!! (Screamed in a shrill hysterical voice).
The vet had called to check on Baron's health after his recent ear infection etc., and instead heard about my emotional health (not good). He suggested neutering Baron immediately. I asked if he had to do it, or could I do it without using an anesthetic. Baron is 10 months old, and the breeder and another vet at the office both suggested waiting until Baron is 11 or 12 months old. Vance agrees with them - but more about that in another e-mail.
Let's look at the bright side - I should sleep well tonight - if Baron will leave room for me on the bed!
Botswain
September 10, 2008
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Baron - coming to a bar near you
Here is the newest update from Poodle Place. An emergency visit to the vet today determined that Baron is drunk! I kid you not, Baron is drunk. I can't tell you how difficult this has been for all of us, here at Poodle Place.
Baron ate 1/2 a loaf of whole wheat bread yesterday (no, I didn't offer it to him as Snow White's Wicked Stepmother might have - tempting though it may be). The bread was placed well out of his range, but, not well enough. Today, Baron appeared clumsier than usual and had an upset stomach (I will spare you the details). I took him to the vet, and it turns out that the bread he pilfered yesterday fermented in his stomach causing a range of problems, comparable to drinking beer. I have the only drunk poodle on the North Shore, and he didn't even drink!
In addition to his trainer and groomer, he may need a visit to Alcoholics Anonymous. Stay tuned for details. While having a puppy can be a challenge, I didn't expect him to be this much of a challenge!
Botswain
August 22, 2008
Baron ate 1/2 a loaf of whole wheat bread yesterday (no, I didn't offer it to him as Snow White's Wicked Stepmother might have - tempting though it may be). The bread was placed well out of his range, but, not well enough. Today, Baron appeared clumsier than usual and had an upset stomach (I will spare you the details). I took him to the vet, and it turns out that the bread he pilfered yesterday fermented in his stomach causing a range of problems, comparable to drinking beer. I have the only drunk poodle on the North Shore, and he didn't even drink!
In addition to his trainer and groomer, he may need a visit to Alcoholics Anonymous. Stay tuned for details. While having a puppy can be a challenge, I didn't expect him to be this much of a challenge!
Botswain
August 22, 2008
Baron - coming to a bank near you
Hi All,
It has been awhile since I filled you in on Baron's growth and development. We had a health issue, but he is doing well right now, so keep your fingers crossed. Unfortunately, we couldn't work on training Baron, and boy are we are paying for that now.
My husband is nuts about this dog; he thinks whatever Baron does is just wonderful. A couple of weeks ago, I found Baron on our kitchen table. Papers were scattered everywhere. Baron was rather proud of his accomplishment, and gave me his best poodle smile (yes, they do smile - and seem to have my sense of humor). When I screamed for Vance, his response was, well, typical. "Isn't he smart? How did he ever get up there? He is afraid to get in the car by himself, but he figured out how to get on the kitchen table! What a dog!" When I pointed out the mess in the kitchen, the response I got was "Oh, it's just paper." Where was he when our kids were growing up?
Here is the really good news! I took Baron to the bank with me today, and they offered him a job as a paper shredder! They feel that Baron is more thorough than the mechanical ones, and has a better personality!
All for now, Baron's personal trainer is due to arrive, and she has her work cut out (literally) for her.
Botswain
It has been awhile since I filled you in on Baron's growth and development. We had a health issue, but he is doing well right now, so keep your fingers crossed. Unfortunately, we couldn't work on training Baron, and boy are we are paying for that now.
My husband is nuts about this dog; he thinks whatever Baron does is just wonderful. A couple of weeks ago, I found Baron on our kitchen table. Papers were scattered everywhere. Baron was rather proud of his accomplishment, and gave me his best poodle smile (yes, they do smile - and seem to have my sense of humor). When I screamed for Vance, his response was, well, typical. "Isn't he smart? How did he ever get up there? He is afraid to get in the car by himself, but he figured out how to get on the kitchen table! What a dog!" When I pointed out the mess in the kitchen, the response I got was "Oh, it's just paper." Where was he when our kids were growing up?
Here is the really good news! I took Baron to the bank with me today, and they offered him a job as a paper shredder! They feel that Baron is more thorough than the mechanical ones, and has a better personality!
All for now, Baron's personal trainer is due to arrive, and she has her work cut out (literally) for her.
Botswain
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